Thursday, April 29, 2010

Little Distractions. . . . . . .

Today I spent the whole day painting but by 5:00 pm I was exhausted. So instead of painting the stairway when Jim got home, I put the patio back together (I had given it a clear coat of paint on Wednesday) and Jim and I sat there with an ice cold Guinness and enjoyed the wind blowing the trees, an array of colorful candles and these beautiful plants: Our anniversary fern from Liz and Thadeus & family, the hosta that is sprouting up everywhere, the beautiful white azaleas and our delicious rosemary. Even with the hard work of painting and arranging, I am loving this life, this home, right here, right now.

Life is good!

Here's to the Journey!

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Name That Color......

I have spent another full day painting. My office is in a shambles as I applied the primer coat today. This room was painted a dark green, and as I touched up the trim, I noticed areas where the walls were originally painted BLACK! I threw away 2 cans of black paint when we moved in, but I had no idea that some of the walls were painted that color prior to the sale of this house.

I like soft colors in my home. I will be painting my office a "Spiced Beige" tomorrow. I painted the family room "Sage Tint" earlier this week which is a beautiful soft green, and I plan to paint the laundry room on Friday a beautiful yellow color called "Summer Moon".

I am already excited to get up tomorrow morning to apply color to my office. I am excited to go to Home Depot tomorrow and pick up the paint for the stairway which Jim will help me with tomorrow night. (The color is "Tea Cookie") And I am excited for the beauty and tranquility that I am creating in our home. Life is good. Living in beauty is so very good too.

Here's to the Journey!

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Angel Sighting!

I had the pleasure of having Rollin stay with us yesterday. He loves to stay with us, and loves the attention he gets. Lots of hugs and kisses, and lots of "I love you's".

When Rollin stays with me, I always like to talk to him about Angels. He has given me much insight, and I love that he speaks from a knowing, not from a "learning" that comes with the years of adulthood. So I asked him, as always, if he had seen any Angles lately. And for the first time, he told me yes. Then he told me the story. It was actually Tucker's Angel. Rollin said he wasn't looking for Angels, its just that when he turned his head to look at Tucker, who was sitting on the sofa, he saw a glimpse of one of his Angels. By now, I am enthralled, and I know that Rollin is so very blessed to see some one's Angel like that.

He told me that the Angel wore a white suit. (He has described this to me before even though he says he had never seen an Angel) And he tells me that the Angel is as big as my fist and that it moves very fast. I ask more questions, and some he can answer, and some he cannot. But I am breathless as I think of this young little child, who is not influenced like me by stories and fairy tales which have been told to me or read by me for many years. I know that Rollin is at that very special age where he can still catch glimpses of that which is eternal. And my heart sings with Joy.

Here's to the Journey!

Sunday, April 25, 2010

A Day At The Zoo!

Yesterday I painted for 12 hours. (I told you.......) So today I was thrilled when Liz called and invited Jim and I to go to the Memphis Zoo with them. After talking with Liz, Fynneus (3 yrs) called back and said in a very deep voice "Come to the Zoo!" So we did.

It was a beautiful sunny day in Memphis. We saw the giraffes being fed. We saw a polar bear playing in the water with a big blue barrel. We saw wolves, seals, antelope, elephants and so much more. But the best part of the day was spending time with the people I love so much. It is such a wonderful feeling to being walking along and have a little hand reach in and take my own. It's feels so good when one of them come running, full throttle, and throw their arms and legs around me and hugs me with all their might.

So when Rollin asked Poppa to put him upon this moose, I couldn't not take a picture of the Joy of our day. I wish now that Liz was in my picture, but she was close by, and it was wonderful to spend time with her. Life is so good.

Here's to the Journey!

Friday, April 23, 2010

I am addicted to painting. We have been in our house for 2 1/2 months, and I can't stop painting yet. When I start a project, I can't (won't) stop until 100% complete. And of course all the rooms needed a fresh coat, or a new color. I even bought a clear paint for my patio. (As if I didn't have enough indoor stuff to paint)

But I do love the satisfaction of a freshly painted room. Today as I continued painting our family room, I burned a sandalwood candle and I listened to Esther Hicks on my iPod. And it felt very satisfying to do this. As I painted, I made plans in my mind to sage the room when I am finished to be sure that Joy and Love fill our home.

But somehow I want to find a balance. I must balance my time for writing, for going to the gym, and for reading. I have been known to paint 12 hours a day without sitting down until dinner time. (I told you I'm addicted) And as I worry about my painting, I find myself feeling too materialistic. There are more important things than the color - or lack of color - in my home. So tonight as I wrap up the day, I will ask my Angels to grant me the courage to say to myself "enough painting already!"

Here's to the Journey!

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Honestly - This is a Joyful Day!

I have had a wonderful/Joyful day today. Tucker spent the night with us, and this morning he climbed in bed with me (already dressed for the day) to share his dreams and thoughts for the day. I am amazed at the honesty of a child. A child will almost always let you know how they feel, what they want, and what they like. I want to be like that. I want to say what I mean and mean what I say. I want to say what I want and want what I say. I want to trust my own intuition to guide me towards my Joy. I find that the more time I spend with my grandsons, the more I admire and appreciate their honesty. This honesty will lead to Joy - always!

Here's to the Journey!

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Today I made my morning walk around the neighborhood. I heard birds singing, I saw clouds passing by, and I felt the cool air on my face. Then I came back home to sit in meditation. I love the quiet mornings and how peacefully my day begins. As I sit at my computer now, I look out and see the green of the grass and trees and a clear blue sky.

And yet I wonder where this all leads. Where am I going on my Journey of Joy? Am I being honest with myself as I write my Joy. I have always felt fear at the idea of laying my soul bare to others. I have trusted very few in my life, with Jim being my main confidante. Yet, even he encourages me to write from my heart. He suggests that I write fiction too and my mind races with the possibility of creating stories.

So as I continue this Journey, I want to look with honesty at my life and the Joy that comes to me in so many ways. The amazing thing about Joy is that it can be such a small thing that makes me smile, such as Fynneus calling this morning to tell me he was eating cookies for breakfast (he was teasing me) and to invite me over to his house to play. It can be the really big things, such as anniversary mile stones or starting a new life in a new city and state. I can embrace each of these with Joy, if I choose, and I can, along the way, create more Joy. My walk this morning was pure Joy. My steaming cup of coffee sitting beside me right now is pure Joy.

Again I look up the definition of Joy which is already marked in my bulky dictionary: "Intense and ecstatic or exultant happiness". And I remember that Joy is the correct word, or as close as I can come, to describing this feeling. The feeling that causes me to write with such passion, to open my soul for others to peer in, casually or intensely at the offering I lay before us.

I am excited again. I know my writing is good for me and I know that Joy can be found in healing. It is healing and therapeutic to look for Joy. When looking for Joy became my main focus, irritations and annoyances became less noticeable. I find myself blessing others instead of wanting to flip them off. And now, every time I bless someone, I always bless myself and my family too. So my blessings increase as does my Joy, my intense, ecstatic and exultant happiness. This is my life. And I will be honest and open in my writing. This is too important to gloss over quickly. I will write with my heart open, with my soul bared to us all, and I will write with a passion for loving life.

Here's to the Journey!

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

My Letter of Love

Dearest Jim,

I started to go buy an anniversary card this morning, and I remembered that I am a writer. I have the words I want to say to you, I have the emotion and the feelings that you have fostered for the past 36 years. So here is my love letter to you on the same day that I promised, long ago, to love, to honor and to cherish you always.

First and foremost, you mean the world to me. So many times I get caught up in the activities of the day and I forget to look at you. I forget to notice the wonderful man who changed my life. Who inspires my life, and who loves me through everything. The Good, the Bad and the Ugly. But, also through the Beauty and the Joy and the Happiness that is our life together.

I love you more than I can express in these words that I put together. I love you with an aching in my soul that our time together will be too short. 100 years would be too short. I love that you saw my beauty long before I did. I love that you reach for me before your eyes (or mine) are open in the morning. I love that you want me to sit with you, even without conversation. I love that you have loved me so much, that you have always provided abundantly for our physical needs of food, clothing and shelter.

I love the father you have been to the two beautiful daughters that you and I created out of love. I love the smell of your shirts after you have worn them for the day, and I always wear your shirt to bed if you are not with me.

I love that you take pride in your workmanship. I love that you are more social than I am. I love that you encourage me to not be afraid.

But the thing I love the most, the thing that takes my breath away, is when you wrap your arms around me. When you kiss me with a passion that 36 years have built. When you desire my body like you did when I was 19 years old. When you can’t wait for me to come back to bed so that we can love. This is what makes my heart ache with love. This is what has never become boring or mundane. This is true love. This is our love.

I love you Jim, and I always will. Happy Anniversary!



Here's to our Journey of Joy!

Monday, April 19, 2010

Tomorrow is our 36th wedding anniversary. We always exchange cards on our anniversary but today I remembered that I am a writer. I know the words to write, I know the emotion that goes into this many years together - I will write my card.

And as I weave these words so lovingly around all of our memories, around our life together, I am grateful for this gift of love. This beautiful gift of True Love.

Here's to the Journey!

Sunday, April 18, 2010

Today Jim and I spent our "lazy Sunday" moving posts on our back patio. It was a beautiful day, and we expanded the open space for our patio table and chairs. However, we were both distracted over and over again by the beautiful azaleas swaying nearby and constantly vying for our attention. They eventually won out, and we stopped to look and take photos of the beautiful flowers.

And, although we gave up our lazy day to do some chores, we were blessed in our efforts by the beauty that surrounded us. As I was preparing lunch, I was thrilled to hear Jim say, as he walked through the kitchen: "This is a beautiful day". And it made me appreciate the day and appreciate him that much more.

We wrapped up our day with a visit to Barnes and Noble and shared a piece of that delicious Godiva Chocolate Cheese cake that we love so much. Then we strolled to the back of the store, to the kids section, and read knock knock jokes to each other, laughing, smiling and touching. Reveling in the beauty of the day that we had spent together.

Here's to the Journey!

Saturday, April 17, 2010

Today I went to watch Tucker and Rollin play tee ball. Their team is called the Red Birds, and we cheered them on for a double header. It brought back memories of our daughters playing sports and the Joy of cheering for them.

I remember encouraging them and their team mates. Calling everyone I knew by name and even being asked by their friends to cheer for them especially when their parents couldn't come. I remember those times with great clarity and I know now that I savored these moments.

As I watch my daughter watch her sons, I see that specialness that is her family. I hear her call their names and cheer for them. I see her give them a smile or a pat and they are ready to take on the world or at least the next game.

I am grateful that I was able to cheer for Jenn and Liz. I am grateful now, that my cheering days are not over and I get to share the Joy of tee ball with my darling grandsons.

Joy is cheering for the Red Birds! Goooooooooo Red Birds!!!!

Here's to the Journey!

Friday, April 16, 2010

This morning as I made my morning walk around the neighborhood, I was serenaded by a host of birds. I could see them flying from roof top to roof top all the while chirping constantly. I love the beauty and the stillness of the morning. I love the sound of birds and I love watching the sky beginning to lighten. Somehow it makes me more appreciative of everything else that flows through out my day. Seeing beauty first thing in the morning helps me to see beauty all day long.

Joy is a quiet morning walk observing the beauty of the day.

Here's to the Journey!

Thursday, April 15, 2010

This evening, while Jim tended the lawn, I watered our herb garden and tomato plants. We have basil, sage, rosemary, parsley and cilantro growing. I have chives which were given to me when we lived in Madison, Indiana. I took them to Florida for 6 years and now we have them planted in Tennessee. It feels so very good to "grow" things.

This is our first spring in this house, and every day we look with Joy at new things popping up through the ground. The azaleas are blooming bright pink and white flowers. A tree in the back yard is beginning to shed its purple flowers and green leaves are forming on its branches.

And while we say we are "growing" this garden, I look in amazement at the miracle of growth. The beauty of these plants and trees, along with the scents and colors, and the taste and feel of the herbs fill me with Joy. I feel a connection with nature as I water these delicate plants that will spice our meals this summer. I feel a connection to the Universe as I observe the beauty of the flowers. And so my garden grows.

Here's to the Journey!

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Tax Time

Joy is completing our tax return the day before the deadline........and then going to Starbucks with Liz, Tucker, Rollin and Fynneus to celebrate. Life is so good!

As we sat at Starbucks this afternoon, I asked each of the boys what we should say now, and they each said: Life is Good! Life is Good! Life is Good!

Here's to the Journey!

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

This afternoon I went to Liz's house and "hung out" with her family. Tonight we went to watch their boys play tee ball and joined them and some of their friends for ice cream at the town square.

Joy is "hanging out" with family for the fun of it!

Here's to the Journey!

Monday, April 12, 2010

Jim and I just returned home to a too quiet house. We dropped our beautiful daughter, Jenn, and her friend Josh, off at the Memphis airport early this evening. They are headed back to NYC after a weekend here with family. On Saturday afternoon, we saw Rudy and her children leave for their return trip home. We are alone after several days of having our home filled with those we love. And although our home feels empty, my heart feels so full of Joy.

I am so grateful to have spent time with Rudy and Devon and Griffin. Rudy has that special gift that allows her to peer into the souls of others, and to read their hearts so accurately. I adore her so very much, and I am so appreciative that we have reconnected at this time. Devon and Griffin shared their souls with me also while they were here, and it was an honor to see these two beautiful young people so filled with love - for themselves and for others. I love them more than I can express in these words that I to put together.

Having Jenn visit us was like the icing on the cake. She is so very beautiful, and a Joy to be with. Our family grew by one this weekend as her friend Josh joined with us and merged and meshed into our family. We were honored to have him in our home, and honored to have Jenn share her Love with us.

Of course, having all of this company brought Liz and her family to our house almost every day. We even did a whole family "sleep over" last night. And Jim and I smiled all morning as we stopped to say how grateful we were to have everyone "home". And it was good to acknowledge that we live in Tennessee so that all of us can be together when Jenn comes to visit. We all love to spend time as a family and we enthusiastically savor every minute for as long as possible. As we say our goodbyes, we are planning when we will be together again - soon.

Now as I wrap up my glorious day, I feel like my heart will burst at the abundance of my Joy.

Here's to the Journey!

Sunday, April 4, 2010

Happy Spring

Today was one of the most beautiful days - ever! Liz and her family joined us early this morning to find eggs hidden by the Easter Bunny in our back yard. Griffin played "bunny" this year. We had a wonderful breakfast together and then packed a picnic. We spent several hours this afternoon flying kites, playing ball, and soaking up some much needed Vitamin D.

It is so wonderful to have Rudy and her children here to celebrate our Happy Spring with us. They were able to join us for some of our family traditions that we began when our daughters were very little. And it is with tremendous Joy that we share our traditions with those we love so much.

Here's to the Journey!

Saturday, April 3, 2010

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Tonight Jim and I went to watch Rollin and Tucker play T-ball. We took our lawn chairs thinking we would enjoy a relaxing evening. However, Jim played catch with Fynneus and before long he was on the field with the coach playing catch with a dozen or so 4 to 8 year olds. I watched with admiration this man who is so versatile, casually playing with a group of children like it was the most natural thing to do.

I love that Jim feels so comfortable in his skin. He knows what he is capable of and he moves with confidence. I love that he loves to be around children and I am grateful he is enjoying the role of "Poppa" as much as I enjoy the role of "Nanna".

Joy is having children in your life.

Here's to the Journey!